Seduction by ego or co-existence?

Is seduction by ego even a thing?

Seduction by ego is definitely a thing. Who do you think talks you into that extra cookie, or sleeping in late, or whatever your particular bad, less then self-promoting habits are? Are you aware how seduction by ego operates in your life? Seduction lives and breeds in marital relationships, friend-to-friend relationships, even parent-child relationships. Why wouldn’t seduction by ego also live and breed in the individual?

Day-to-day, how does co-existence with your Ego work? Is there a pathway for collaboration with your Ego? Or, are your neurons firmly wired to accept seduction by ego only? Maybe it’s time to start training for a loving, compassionate co-existence with your Ego. Or at the very least, to start watching for a collaborative relationship and conversation with your seductive ego.

Collaborating with your ego?

Collaborating with your ego? Why not? Human potential and all that. Two humans merge households in marriage, and they collaborate, masculine and feminine. Why not apply that to aspects of yourself, specifically a collaboration between your higher self and your lower self or ego?

Discernment would play a role, which connotes non-attachment up front for the neutral space to be available in which discernment may arise. Sounds like a healthy practice. (Both the Enneagram and the Myers-Briggs (MBTI) can help locate a reliable neutral place, from which to experience otherwise potentially charged egoic states or seduction by ego.)

“Why do people struggle so to lose their ego and get to bliss? Swift may have captured the answer in her line: ‘Cause you know I love the players, And you love the game.’

Two seduction by ego states: sexy dangerous or loving collaboration

Two love songs come to my mind when I think about collaborating with or being seduced by ego, each song revealing two different emotional or consciousness state: 1) Sexy Dangerous Ego State and 2) Loving Collaboration States.

When I listen to love songs, I often think of them as self-talk between egoic me and higher self me, or between me and my spiritual Beloved self. Much of Rumi’s lover poetry lends itself in this way as well, so there seems to be some credence to this inner self, or self-love story angle.

I also might think of my ego as I would a dog, which is a great companion most of the time. But, just like a dog HAS to roll around in the stinky stuff, sometimes your Ego HAS to take you on a bender. Seduction by ego to do that thing which really you know better, is the worst. Your dog can’t help itself; it is a dog’s nature. You can change your nature, and shift your seduction by ego habit. When you shift, you and your Ego may cohabitate beautifully.

That’s how I view the next two Monday Music selections. This week’s selection is Taylor Swift’s “Blank Space” as posted on YouTube: (Tune in next week for “part 2” of this conversation: collaborating with your Ego.)

The incredible things of ego: magic, madness, heaven, sin

In “Blank Space,” I think of Swift, the song narrator, as the Ego—seducing the part of us that knows better. She sings:

“Nice to meet you, where you been?
I could show you incredible things: Magic, madness, heaven, sin
Saw you there and I thought Oh my God, look at that face
You look like my next mistake Love’s a game, wanna play?”

I especially love the line “You look like my next mistake Love’s a game, wanna play?” If you been working with yourself, you’ll understand why. Sometimes it is just so easy to go on “automatic” and do what you always do, playing the game, making the mistake, because it’s a little more exciting than the straight and narrow? Also, those lines, when you think of girls getting with bad boys for the fun of it, it just puts a different spin or drama on the games you play with your own ego; and that by itself gives you a piece/peace of observation that might allow neutrality to sink in. And then the automatic nature of Seductive Ego gets a bright light shone on it. With awareness, new behavior can be developed.

“You know [ego] love[s] the players And you love the game”

And the sad truth of all our egoic little games we play, Swift captures it in her line: “‘Cause you know I love the players And you love the game.” Why do people struggle so to lose their ego and get to bliss? Well, perhaps they love the game more than they are conscious enough to admit. And another great line: “‘Cause, darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” So true: our egoic benders seem so perfect until the bottom falls out and we see we’ve gotten caught in our old habits of behavior, from which we were sure we had freely evolved.

As you go through your week, watch and see if you are seduced by your Ego. It’s not a problem if you are; the problem only arises, when you don’t know you’ve been seduced by your ego. Tune in the Grounded Relating Monday Music Challenge next week to hear a song about collaborating with your ego.

The full lyrics from azlyrics.com for “Blank Space” by Taylor Swift on the album “1989” are posted below:

Nice to meet you, where you been?
I could show you incredible things: Magic, madness, heaven, sin
Saw you there and I thought Oh my God, look at that face
You look like my next mistake Love’s a game, wanna play?

New money, suit and tie I can read you like a magazine
Ain’t it funny, rumors fly And I know you heard about me
So hey, let’s be friends I’m dying to see how this one ends
Grab your passport and my hand
I can make the bad guys good for a weekend

[CHORUS] So it’s gonna be forever Or it’s gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it’s over If the high was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-lovers They’ll tell you I’m insane
‘Cause you know I love the players And you love the game

‘Cause we’re young and we’re reckless We’ll take this way too far
It’ll leave you breathless Or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex-lovers They’ll tell you I’m insane
But I’ve got a blank space, baby, And I’ll write your name

Cherry lips, crystal skies I could show you incredible things
Stolen kisses, pretty lies You’re the King, baby, I’m your Queen
Find out what you want Be that girl for a month
Wait, the worst is yet to come, oh no

Screaming, crying, perfect storms I can make all the tables turn
Rose garden filled with thorns Keep you second guessing like
“Oh my God, who is she?” I get drunk on jealousy
But you’ll come back each time you leave
‘Cause, darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream

Boys only want love if it’s torture
Don’t say I didn’t say, I didn’t warn ya
Boys only want love if it’s torture
Don’t say I didn’t say, I didn’t warn ya

‘Cause we’re young and we’re reckless We’ll take this way too far
It’ll leave you breathless Or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex-lovers They’ll tell you I’m insane
But I’ve got a blank space, baby And I’ll write your name